Photo: Magic Murf & G$ on a golf cart ride. We also belong to a gang in South Florida known as The Ladies with Hats. I am wearing my late Aunt Monica’s hat, my mom’s twin sister who died in August of 2024. She would have loved that golf cart ride.
Over the course of ten days, I have received so much kindness and love from friends and family. My friend who gave me refuge yet again sent me off with $100 and another friend Venmo $100 of gas money. On May 30 th I traveled to Lantana, Florida and had lunch with my Jewish Moma, a former colleague from 23 years ago. I am her Irish Daughter, and we had such a wonderful visit at a lovely waterfront restaurant called The Hive. Our conversation was filled with loving support, encouragement, and compliments that countered the negative narrative that had been swirling in my head for decades.
Then I spent the night with Meghan and Steve in West Palm Beach. I made charcuterie and Steve made ribs, and we all had a good laugh and conversation over food and drinks and an early night to bed.
Photo: Judi, my Jewish Moma and me, her Irish daughter. We worked together 23 years ago.
On May 31st I headed north at the break of dawn to Ashburn, GA to visit my dear friend, G$. Along the way I texted my nephew who attends Valdosta State to see if he might want to get together. The drive was easy and filled with a lot of singing and some crying. Some angry talking to process the hurtful things that had been said to me. When I arrived in the afternoon to Wanee Lake Golf & RV Resort, it was time for laughter and shenanigans. As I shared last week time with G$ is always soul nourishing. We went on a couple wild golf cart rides, Mexican restaurant with some of her RV friends, pizza at Bill’s in Sylvester, GA, we threw a birthday dinner for a new neighbor of hers, Jacob, and had nearly nightly campfire sing-a-longs.
Photo: Downtown art in Ashburn, GA.
She joined me for lunch with my nephew. It was my first time in his 20 years of having a near solo visit. It was nice to learn about him and his views on life without any filters. We had lunch at the restaurant he is a line cook at and found another place to hang and chat after a tour of his campus. I am so proud of the young man he is and is becoming! I hope it will be one of many visits to come. I am so grateful for my time with G$ and my nephew. I am grateful for the two conversations I had at the Piggly Wiggly with two female employees that gave way to sharing stories about our moms who have died. I am grateful for these serendipitous moments between strangers that are meaningful and impactful for my grief journey.
On Friday, I said farewell to G$ and her wonderful hospitality and set off for Crestview, Florida to meet Alissa, a woman I met through a Facebook group for Intentional Communities in March. We have had several conversations since March, and this was our first meeting face to face to stay on her 35 acres of land that she intends to create glamping and retreat facilities. We tent camped, cooked, swam in the spring-fed creek, and got to know one another better. It felt so wonderful to be surrounded by the calmness of nature. The urge to self-sooth with food was gone. We both recently lost our mothers after caregiving for them, and we shared conversations on that as well. We began building a shed that the weather prevented us from finishing. It felt good to be in my body, doing functional activity, and communing with nature.
Photo: Beautiful dragonfly on a leaf near one of the many spring fed creeks on Alissa’s land.
Every day I sketched in my pad with colored pencils. It was a wonderful first visit and I can see myself returning and perhaps helping her shape the land to her vision. My dream of having a tiny home in a wild nature setting is a seed that has the possibility to germinate from this connection. I am grateful for meeting Alissa and seeing how well our personalities and skills complement one another. I am grateful for how powerfully I experience nature.
I had an overnight stay in Montgomery, AL and then I arrived in Lenoir City, TN to visit my stepdaughter and friend, Heidi and her husband Steve. This was my first time to their Tennessee home as they are Traveling Wilburys too. Heidi is an amazing vegan chef, and we made a lemon meringue pie together and I assisted in assembling her vegan charcuterie, A-MAZING!
Photo; Heidi Olive, Vegan Chef and owner of the catering and cooking class small business, Olive My Heart, in Lenoir City, TN. Check her out on Instagram @olivemyhearttn #supportsmallandlocal
Heidi and I went for a walk at McFee Park after dinner that had canopied sidewalks and forest hiking trails, wild blackberries which reminded me of my mom with a smile, and bunnies and bird watching galore. After we came home, we shared photos and poetry since our last visit in September 2024. Steve, an avid reader, recommended a book for me to read during my stay, The Surrender Experiment: my journey into life’s perfection, by Michael A. Singer. I am so grateful for my enduring relationship with Heidi even though her dad and I amicably ended our relationship in 2015. I am grateful that she found a devoted partner in Steve, and for his unique and silly sense of humor. I am grateful for how special they make me feel when I visit them.
Photo: McFee Park in Lenoir City, TN.
Change your environment, change your life. Focus on your blessings, not your challenges. Give thanks for what is going well and even what is not going well. If it wasn’t for the blatant mistreatment, I would not be on this wonderful healing adventure.